I recently read a blog post regarding oral language development in toddlers and how to encourage it and it was a really useful article.
But what really stood out for me was one example the writer gave where the mother said to the toddler “we went to the toilet, didn’t we?” and she pointed out that it’s wrong and that kids need to know I, you, he, etc. I totally agree with that perspective but reading it out loud made complete sense to me, there is no “I” anymore.
When you give birth it’s like a piece of you is not yours anymore. It’s your baby’s. That is why you feel so weird when your baby is not around, it’s literally like a piece of you is missing. And then you have another baby and another piece of you is gone. It’s so weird yet so natural at the same time.
There is no “I” anymore, well actually literaly there isn’t. When your toddler goes potty is like you went as well, it feels like you both accomplished it. You no longer think about you, you always think and worry about someone else. It’s finally the time to have some “me” time and yet you are sitting there thinking of possible meals you can cook for tomorrow, or what activities you can all do together. You go out and you are in that awkward situation where all you are talking about are your kids, can’t even think of anything else that is as interesting as them!
There is only we. Nothing you do is actually only about you. Yes, you do things for you, but again if you look at it from a different perspective when you are happy they are happy and also the mom guilt is most of the times over the roof and you end up thinking about your kids again. It’s so weird and it can’t really be explained but I know that every single mum out there can totally relate to this.
So is it really wrong saying we instead of I? Is there even an I anymore?